I really struggled whether or not I should post this in my beauty section or my motherhood section! Haha! It fits it both categories so well, doesn't it?! LOL
So, to start this blog post off so it will make more sense to you I'm going to give you a little background on my weight loss story...
My WHOLE family are very skinny people naturally. My sister and mother combined MAY weight as much as me together if not less. I have always been the biggest one in my family even when I was a size 5. I was fit my whole life until my father passed away when I was 17. The first thing I did when my dad passed was go straight to McDonalds and ate everything in site. I could eat anything I wanted (and did) and wouldn't gain weight. After my dad passed, I noticed I started gaining weight rapidly over the course of a couple months. I was still quite small though, so i didnt pay much mind to it and I was grieving as well. I gained about 20-30 pounds over a couple months.
About two years later, I got pregnant with my first child. I was 19 at the time and about a size 11. I had serious morning sickness throughout my WHOLE pregnancy so I only ended up gaining about 10 pounds from that which, was pretty much all baby. After I had my daughter, I actually went down to a size 9 but obtained a nice little mommy pouch that most of us all know and hate. My daughters father HATED my weight gain and mommy pouch and didnt hesitate to let me know. He urged me to work out and lose weight. He got very verbally abusive with it at times as well as forcing me to run up and down our road while he followed behind me with a bike and kept little food in the house. Mind you, this man was about 130 pounds soaking wet.
I eventually smartened up and left this man and moved in with my mother. I was a size 9 still but extremely stressed out. I was a nervous wreck to be honest. It was my first time being a single parent, i didnt have a home, and I had just lost my car and job at that time. I eat my emotions of course but, this was another situation where a lot of food was not readily available so it kept me from gaining weight.
Not long after, I met my husband, the LOVE of my life. I was still a size 9 mind you. He took me out on my first REAL date to an amazing Italian restaurant and that, my friends,is where EVERYTHING went wrong!
The more I got comfortable with my husband, the more I ate around him (Im not the type to eat around men i just meet. Stupid, I know). I was still living at my mothers and he was living at his mothers at the time so, we would always go out to eat and splurge on big, unhealthy meals. I slowly started gaining weight. Due to both our circumstances, we ended up getting an apartment together after less than a year together. That is when my husband started cooking for me. I had no idea this man could cook the things he could and he opened me up to a world of different foods. At that time, Aldi's food was about as advanced as I was! He showed me new cheeses and breads and cooked enough for 10 people every time we ate dinner. We ate huge steaks and mashed potatoes multiple times a week. So, you guessed it, i gained weight quickly. I went from a size 9 to a size 14 quickly. I didnt mind too much bc my husband loved me and never said anything and always told me I was beautiful. Not to mention he was gaining weight as well so I dont think he wanted to go there. I just started gaining weight until I was at a size 16.
A couple years down the I got pregnant with my second child, my son. Again, I only gained about 11 pounds and lost it right away when he was born. But my mommy pouch got a little bigger (and so did the stretch marks).I stayed at a size 16 even though it was a bit big to cover my mommy pouch. No muffin tops over here!! After my son though, I immediately started craving chocolate. Specifically, caramel nut clusters. I went through tubs and tubs of these and it was mostly the only thing i ate. You can guess what happened. I went straight to a size 18.
I have always struggled with my weight. My weight has always yo-yo'd. I can lose 20 pounds quickly and gain 35 back even quicker. I never worked out in any of this because my husband loved me and never made me feel different. I thought about diets but watched people i loved go on them and completely lose themselves. They would either fail, and gain more weight, which scared the shit out of me OR they would succeed and become those assholes that talk shit about people struggling with their weight or they wont SHUT UP about fitness and weight loss. I didnt want either of those so i just did my normal everyday thing.
I started YouTube at a size 18 and once I got into the community more and met some amazing women, I have decided to take the plunge and start a fitness and diet plan. I decided that I would NOT lose myself in this. That I would do what fits me best in the way it fits me best. I want a complete life style change, NOT personality change. Once i convinced myself of this, I took the plunge. I found that its not the weight loss that changes people. Its people that change people. I dont have to be like that but i also dont have to live unhappy about my appearance and self. So I joined a weight loss collab with a bunch of AMAZING women. We put NO pressure on ourselves, we are not all doing the same thing, and there is NO time limit. Just the day to day struggle of fitness and diet together. This was made by an amazing friend of mine Ellie. Its called the Ellko Health Team. I urge you to join, no matter who you are! It is so welcoming there and no judgment. You can be yourself and the women with success only praise you and support you.
I am now down 22 pounds and counting and a size 14. Im happy, Im getting healthy and most importantly...Im still me :)
Ellko Health Team- https://www.facebook.com/groups/381134438716425/
I'm a 30 yr old stay at home mother who loves anything beauty related. I'm down to earth and love making new friends! Come, stay a while and chat with me! Comments are SO welcome!